A man is dining in a fancy restaurant and there is a gorgeous redhead sitting at the next table.
He has been checking her out since he sat down, but lacks the nerve to talk with her. Suddenly she sneezes, and her glass eye comes flying out of its socket toward the man.
He reflexively reaches out, grabs it out of the air, and hands it back.
‘Oh my, I am so sorry,’ the woman says as she pops her eye back in place.
‘Let me buy your dinner to make it up to you,’ she says. They enjoy a wonderful dinner together, and afterwards they go to the theatre followed by drinks.
They talk, they laugh, she shares her deepest dreams and he shares his.
She listens.
After paying for everything, she asks him if he would like to come to her place for a nightcap and stay for breakfast.
They had a wonderful, wonderful time. The next morning, she cooks a gourmet meal with all the trimmings.
The guy is amazed.
Everything had been SO incredible! ‘You know,’ he said, ‘you are the perfect woman.
Are you this nice to every guy you meet?’ ‘No,’ she replies. . . ‘You just happened to catch my eye
--Texas Trooper--
Two guys are speeding through Texas when a state trooper pulls them over.
The trooper walks up to the drivers side of the car, gets out his billy club and smacks the driver across the face.
Stunned, the driver asks, "Why did you do that??" The trooper responds, "You're in Texas now son, you have that license out and ready around here!" "I apologize sir, I'm not from around here."
The trooper then walks to the passenger side of the car, and taps on the window.
The passenger rolls down his window and the trooper takes out his club and smacks the passenger across the face.
"What was that for?" asked the passenger. "
I know your kind," says the trooper, "About two miles down the road you would have looked at your buddy and said 'I wish that son of a bitch would have tried that crap with me!"'
