A young woman brings home her fiance to meet her parents.
After dinner, her mother tells her father to find out about the young man.
The father invites the fiance to his study for a drink.
‘So what are your plans?’ the father asks the young man.
‘I am a Torah scholar,’ he replies.
‘A Torah scholar. Hmmm,’ the father says.
‘admirable, but what will you do to provide a nice house for my daughter to live in, as she’s accustomed to?’
‘I will study,’ the young man replies, ‘and God will provide for us.’
‘And how will you buy her a beautiful engagement ring, such as she deserves?’ asks the father.
‘I will concentrate on my studies,’ the young man replies, ‘God will provide for us.’
‘And children?’ asks the father. ‘How will you support children?’
“Don’t worry, sir, God will provide,” replies the fiance
The conversation proceeds like this, and each time the father questions,
The young idealist insists that God will provide.
Later, the mother asks, ‘How did it go, darling?’
The father answers, ‘He has no job and no plans, but the good news is, he thinks I’m God.’
-- A rather confident man walks into a bar
--
A rather confident man walks into a bar and takes a seat next to a very attractive woman.
He gives her a quick glance, then casually looks at his watch for a moment.
The woman notices this and asks, ”Is your date running late?” ”No,” he replies, ”I just bought this state-of-the-art watch and I was just testing it.” The intrigued woman says, ”A state-of-the-art watch?
What’s so special about it?” ”It uses alpha waves to telepathically talk to me,” he explains. ”What’s it telling you now?” she asked. ”Well, it says you’re not wearing any panties.” he said.
The woman giggles and replies, ”Well it must be broken then because I am wearing panties!” The man explains, ”Damn thing must be an hour fast.”
