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Three old men were sitting on a bench when a reporter approached them.
“I wonder if you three would be willing to do an interview and tell me your secret to long life,” the reporter asked.
The three old men agreed and the reporter asked the first old man his secret to long life.
“I never drank alcohol, I never smoked tobacco and I have been married to the same woman for fifty years.”
“That's really remarkable!” said the reporter, “And how old are you?”
“I'm 93,” said the first old man.
The second man was asked the same question on his secret to long life.
“I drank on occasion, I smoked, but not often and I dated some.”
“And how old are you?” asked the reporter.
“I'm 91,” said the second old man.
Finally, the reporter approached the third old man and asked his secret to a long life.
“I dated every woman that would go out with me, I drank until I passed out and I smoked three packs of cigarettes a day.”
“Wow!” said the reporter, “And how old are you?”
“29,” replied the third man.
--AN OLD FRENCH LADY HAD A SMALL SHOP --
An old French lady had a small shop in her village for years until one day a huge corporate supermarket set up across the road from her little shop.
They put up signs advertising their prices, including one that said:
Butter – 10 francs.
In response, the old lady added a sign to her own window:
Butter – 9 francs.
The next day, the big supermarket had a new sign:
Butter – 8 francs.
Sure enough, the day after the lady’s sign now read:
Butter – 7 francs.
This went on for a while until eventually one of the lady’s customers pointed to the sign and said,
“Madame, you cannot keep your prices so low for long. These big companies can use their buying power to sell products cheaper, but a little store like yours can never compete.”
In response, the old lady bent forward conspiratorially and muttered,
“Monsieur, I don’t even sell butter.”
