There once was a blind old man who decided to visit Texas.
When he arrived on the plane, he felt the seats and said,
“Wow, these seats are big!”
The person next to him answered,
“Everything is big in Texas.”
When he finally arrived in Texas, he decided to visit a bar.
Upon arriving in the bar, he ordered a beer and got a mug placed between his hands.
He exclaimed, “Wow these mugs are big!”
The bartender replied,
“Everything is big in Texas.”
After a couple of beers, the blind old man asked the bartender where the bathroom was located.
The bartender replied,
“Second door to the right.”
The old man headed for the bathroom, but accidentally tripped over a bucket and skipped the second door.
Instead, he entered the third door, which leads to the swimming pool and fell into the pool by accident.
Scared to death, the blind old man started shouting…
“Don’t flush, don’t flush!”
--A wife arrived home after a long shopping trip, and was horrified to find her husband in bed with a young, lovely thing.--
Just as she was about to storm out of the house, her husband stopped her with these words:
“Before you leave, I want you to hear how this all came about.
Driving home, I saw this young girl, looking poor and tired, I offered her a ride.
She was hungry, so I brought her home and fed her some of the roast you had forgotten about in the refrigerator.”
Her shoes were worn out so I gave her a pair of your shoes you didn’t wear because they were out of style.
She was cold so I gave her that new birthday sweater you never wore even once because the color didn’t suit you.
Her slacks were worn out so I gave her a pair of yours that you don’t fit into anymore.
Then as she was about to leave the house, she paused and asked,
“Is there anything else that your wife doesn’t use anymore?”
“And so, here we are!”
