A man boarded an airplane and took his seat. As he settled in, he glanced up and saw the most beautiful woman boarding the plane. He soon realized she was heading straight towards his seat. As fate would have it, she took the seat right beside his.
Eager to strike up a conversation he blurted out, ‘Business trip or pleasure’?
She turned, smiled and said, ‘Business. I’m going to the Annual Nymphomaniacs of America Convention in Boston’.
He swallowed hard. Here was the most gorgeous woman he had ever seen sitting next to him, and she was going to a meeting of nymphomaniacs.
Struggling to maintain his composure, he calmly asked, ‘What’s your business role at this convention?’
‘Lecturer,’ she responded. ‘I use information that I have learned from my personal experiences to debunk some of the popular myths about sexuality’.
‘Really?’ he said. ‘And what kind of myths are there’?
‘Well’, she explained, ‘one popular myth is that African-American men are the most well-endowed of all men, when in fact it is the Native American Indian who is most likely to possess that trait’.
‘Another popular myth is that Frenchmen are the best lovers when actually it is men of Jewish descent who are the best’.
‘I have also discovered that the lover with absolutely the best stamina is the Southern Redneck’.
Suddenly the woman became a little uncomfortable and blushed. ‘I’m sorry,’ she said, ‘I shouldn’t really be discussing all of this with you. I don’t even know your name’.
‘Tonto’, the man said, ‘Tonto Goldstein, but my friends call me Bubba’.
--Funny Joke ‣ Good Night Kiss--
One night a guy takes his girlfriend home.
As they are about to kiss each other goodnight at the front door, the guy starts feeling a little frisky:
With an air of confidence, he leans with his hand against the wall and smiling, he says to her. “Honey, would you have s''e'x with me?”
Horrified, she replies. “Are you mad? My parents will see us!”
“Oh come on! Who’s gonna see us at this hour?” He asks, grinning at her.
“No, please. Can you imagine if we get caught?”
“Oh come on! There’s nobody around, they’re all sleeping!”
“No way. It’s just too risky!”
“Oh please, please, I love you so much!”
“No, no, and no. I love you too, but I just can’t!”
“Oh, yes you can. Please?”
“No, no. I just can’t”
“I’m begging you.”
Out of the blue, the light on the stairs goes on, and the girl’s older sister shows up in her pyjamas, hair dishevelled, and in a sleepy voice, she says:
“Dad says to go ahead and take him upstairs if you want, or I can do it, or if need be, mum says she can come down herself and do it, but for God’s sake, tell him to take his hand off the intercom!”
