Four nuns are in line to go into heaven.
God asks the first nun if she has ever sinned.
She says, “Well, I’ve seen a tool.”
So God puts holy water on her eyes and lets her enter.
He asks the second nun the same thing and she says, “I’ve held a tool,”
so he puts holy water on her hands and lets her enter.
Then the fourth nun skips the third nun in line and God asks why she did that.
The 4th nun replies, “Well, I need to gargle it before she sits in it.”
--A brunette goes into a doctor’s office --
A brunette goes into a doctor’s office and says that her body hurts wherever she touches it.
“Impossible,” says the doctor. “Show me.”
She takes her finger, presses on her elbow, and screams in agony.
She pushes her knee and screams, pushes her ankle and screams, and so it goes on; everywhere she touches makes her scream with pain.
The doctor says, “You’re not really a brunette are you?”
She says, “No, I dyed my hair. I’m naturally blonde.”
“I thought so,” he says.
“Your finger is broken.”
