A virile, middle aged Italian gentlemen named Guido was relaxing at his favourite bar in Rome when he managed to attract the attention of a spectacular young blonde woman...
Things progressed to the point where he invited her back to his apartment and, after some small talk, they retired to his bedroom where he rattled her senseless.
After a pleasant interlude he asked with a smile, "So, you finish"...?
She paused for a second, frowned, and replied, "No"...
Surprised, Guido reached for her and the rattling resumed...
This time she thrashed about wildly and there were screams of passion...
The sex finally ends and, again, Guido smiles and asks, "You finish"...?
Again, after a short pause, she returns his smile, cuddles closer to him and softly says, "No"...
Stunned, but damned if he was going to leave this woman unsatisfied, Guido reaches for the woman yet again...
Using the last of his strength, he barely manages it, but they end together screaming, bucking, clawing and ripping the bed sheets...
Exhausted, Guido falls onto his back, gasping...
Struggling to turn his head, he looks into her eyes, smiles proudly and asks again,
"You finish"...?
Barely able to speak, the beautiful blonde whispers in his ear,
"No, I Norwegian"...😂
--Smoking A Joint--
A monkey is sitting in a tree smoking a joint when a lizard walks past, looks up and says to the monkey
"Hey, what're you doing?"
The monkey replies, "Smokin' a joint, come up and have some."
So the lizard climbs up and sits next to the monkey and they smoke a few joints.
After a while the lizard says his mouth is 'dry' and he's going to get a drink from the river.
The lizard is so stoned that he leans over too far and falls into the river.
A crocodile sees this and swims over to the lizard and helps him to the side, then asks the lizard, "What's the matter with you?"
The lizard explains to the crocodile that he was sitting up a tree with a monkey smoking pot, got too stoned and then fell into the river while taking a drink.
The crocodile says he has to check this out and wanders into the jungle. He finds the tree where the monkey is sitting finishing up a joint.
The crocodile yells up to the monkey and says "Hey!"
The monkey looks down and says, "F*ck man! How much water did you drink?!?"
