At a Senior Citizen’s luncheon, a gentleman and a lady struck up a conversation and discovered that they both loved to fish.
Since both of them were widowed, they decided to go fishing together the next day:
The gentleman picked the lady up and they headed to the river to his fishing boat and started out on their adventure.
They were riding down the river when there was a fork in the river and the gentleman asked the lady.
“Do you want to go up or down?”
All of a sudden the lady stripped off her shirt and pants and made mad passionate love to the man right there in the boat.
When they finished, the man couldn’t believe what had just happened.
He had just experienced the best s*x that he’d had in years.
They fished for a while and continued on down the river when soon they came upon another fork in the river.
He again asked the lady.
“Up or down?”
There she went again, stripped off her clothes and made wild passionate love to him again.
This really impressed the gentleman, so he asked her to go fishing again the next day.
She said yes and there they were the next day, riding in the boat when they came upon the fork in the river, and the elderly gentleman asked. “Up or down?”
The woman replied. “Down.”
A little puzzled and disappointed, the gentleman guided the boat down the river when he came upon another fork in the river and he asked the lady. “Up or down?”
She replied. “Up.”
This really confused the gentleman so he asked.
“What’s the deal? Yesterday, every time I asked you if you wanted to go up or down you made passionate love to me.
Now today, nothing!”
She replied.
“Well, yesterday I wasn’t wearing my hearing aid and I thought the choices were. ‘f*ck or drown.’”
--An Old Woman Was Furious--
The light turned yellow, just in front of him.
He did the right thing, stopping at the crosswalk, even though he could have beaten the red light by accelerating through the intersection.
The tailgating old woman was furious and honked her horn, screaming in frustration, as she missed her chance to get through the intersection, dropping her cell phone and makeup.
As she was still in mid-rant, she heard a tap on her window and looked up into the face of a very serious police officer.
The officer ordered her to exit her car with her hands up.
He took her to the police station where she was searched, fingerprinted, photographed, and placed in a holding cell.
After a couple of hours, a policeman approached the cell and opened the door.
She was escorted back to the booking desk where the arresting officer was waiting with her personal effects.
He said,
” I’m very sorry for this mistake. You see, I pulled up behind your car while you were blowing your horn, flipping off the guy in front of you and cussing a blue streak at him.
I noticed the ‘What Would Jesus Do’ bumper sticker, the ‘Choose Life’ license plate holder, the ‘Follow Me to Sunday School’ bumper sticker, and the chrome-plated Christian fish emblem on the trunk, so naturally…I assumed you had stolen the car.”
