A kid comes home from school with a writing assignment.
He asks his father for help.
“Dad, can you tell me the difference between potential and reality?”
His father looks up, thoughtfully, and then says, “I’ll demonstrate. Go ask your mother if she would sleep with Robert Redford for a million dollars.
Then go ask your sister if she would sleep with Brad Pitt for a million dollars.
Then come back and tell me what you’ve learned.”
The kid is puzzled, but decides to ask his mother.
“Mom, if someone gave you a million dollars, would you sleep with Robert Redford?”
“Don’t tell your father, but, yes, I would.”
He then goes to his sister’s room.
“Sis, if someone gave you a million dollars, would you sleep with Brad Pitt?”
She replies, “Omigod! Definitely!”
The kid goes back to his father.
“Dad, I think I’ve figured it out. Potentially, we are sitting on two million bucks, but in reality, we are living with two sluts.”
--A small guy goes into an elevator--
A small guy goes into an elevator and notices a huge guy standing next to him.
The big guy looks down on the small white guy and says, “Seven foot tall, three hundred fifty pounds, twenty-inch weapon, three-pound left ball, three-pound right ball, Turner Brown.”
The small guy faints!
The big guy picks up the small guy and brings him to, slapping his face and shaking him.
He asks the small guy, “What’s wrong?”
The small guy says, “Excuse me, but what did you say?”
The big guy looks down and says “Seven foot tall, three hundred fifty pounds, twenty-inch weapon, three- pound left ball, three-pound right ball, my name is Turner Brown.”
The small guy says, “Thank God, I thought you said, “Turn around.”