A third-grade teacher asked her class “what is a grandparent?”
The 8-year-old students took no time to respond with some of the most heartwarming and hilarious answers we’ve ever read.
Children really have a magnificent view of the world!
1- Grandparents are a lady and a man who have no little children of their own. They like other people.
2- A grandfather is a man and a grandmother is a lady.
3- Grandparents don’t have to do anything except be there when we come to see them. They are so old, they shouldn’t play hard or run. It is good if they drive us to the shops and give us money.
4- When they take us for walks, they slow down past things like pretty leaves and caterpillars.
5- They show us and talk to us about the colours of the flowers and also why we shouldn’t step on “cracks”.
6- They don’t say, “Hurry up.”
7- Usually, grandmothers are fat but not too fat to tie your shoes.
8- They wear glasses and funny underwear.
9- They can take their teeth and gums out.
10- Grandparents don’t have to be smart.
11- They have to answer questions like “Why isn’t God married?” and “How come dogs chase cats?”
12- When they read to us, they don’t skip. They don’t mind if we ask for the same story over again.
13- Everybody should try to have a grandmother, especially if you don’t have television because they are the only grownups who like to spend time with us.
14- They know we should have a snack time before bedtime, and they say prayers with us and kiss us even when we’ve acted bad.
15- Grandpa is the smartest man on earth. He teaches me good things, but I don’t get to see him enough to get as smart as him.
16- It’s funny when they bend over; you hear gas leaks, and they blame their dog.
17- Grandma, she lives at the airport, and when we want her we just go and get her. Then when she’s done having her visit, we take her back to the airport.
--A Guy Walks Into A Bar With His Dog--
A guy walks into a bar with his dog and says, I’ll have a Scotch and water and my dog would like a whiskey sour.
The bartender says,
“Sorry, we don’t allow animals in here.”
The dog replies,
“Hey, I’m tired of being discriminated against. Just give me a drink.”
The bartender says, “Oh, no, not another ventriloquist with the old talking dog trick. Both of you, get out of here!”
“No, no, no, this isn’t a trick, I promise you,” says the man,
“I tell you what, I’ll go for a walk around the block and you talk to Rover here.”
The man leaves and the bartender sees him turn the corner.
“Now, can I have my drink.” says the dog.
The bartender is amazed.
“Sure you can and it’s on the house! Listen, can you do me a favor? My wife works next door at the cafe.
It’ll make her day if you go in and order a cup of coffee. Here’s ten bucks and you can keep the change afterwards.”
“Okay.” says the dog and he takes the ten dollars and leaves.
Ten minutes go by and the dog doesn’t come back.
The owner returns and asks where is the dog.
So both of them go off to see what happened to the dog.
As they approach the cafe, they see Rover going at it hot and heavy with a French poodle in the alley between the bar and cafe.
The owner shouts, “
Rover! What are you doing! You’ve never done this before!”
The dog shrugged.
“Hell, I’ve never had any money before.”
